Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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