he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize