You work out of a Hotel?
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
