What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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