If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
19 Movie Extras Reveal What It’s Like To Work With Celebrities
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.