Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
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