Say something about gay babies.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Randomize
