we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Holy shit dude........stairs
why does every cop we meet know your name?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
