yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize