she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
