im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Just invented taco cereal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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