I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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