Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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