How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
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