I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
