Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Randomize
