i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize