did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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