Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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