Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
