Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Dear god my vagina.
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