I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
The feeling are messing with the penis
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize