this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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