When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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