i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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