Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize