Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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