ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
