My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
