are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
