im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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