you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
