Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize