Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word

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(248): hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word http://tfl.nu/bxy9

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(206): View more from Washington

you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."

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(206): you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing." http://tfl.nu/7ght

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.

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(978): your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop. http://tfl.nu/x1i9

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(555): View more from

Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.

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(555): Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style. http://tfl.nu/a25z

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(206): View more from Washington

He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom

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(206): He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom http://tfl.nu/tvji

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(706): View more from Georgia

we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.

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(706): we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating. http://tfl.nu/lk5p

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????

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(414): they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed???? http://tfl.nu/zsp8

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(339): View more from Massachusetts

I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette

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(339): I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette http://tfl.nu/67ko

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.

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(717): I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top. http://tfl.nu/bct2

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(919): View more from North Carolina

its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.

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(919): its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night. http://tfl.nu/phgw

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(954): View more from Florida

It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.

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(954): It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride. http://tfl.nu/ze4c

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.

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(508): in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar. http://tfl.nu/rqsf

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(517): View more from Michigan

Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.

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(517): Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned. http://tfl.nu/fz01

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(303): View more from Colorado

He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.

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(303): He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts. http://tfl.nu/jof7

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(317): View more from Indiana

He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him

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(317): He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him http://tfl.nu/vd38

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