She's JV to your varsity
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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