It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
