just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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