I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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