Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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