is wine microwaveable?
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
