Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
