I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
