I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
The power of my boobs compel you
My Sexting was not on an AP level
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
