i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
my liver is dry heaving
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
