love makes seman taste better
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
