tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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