would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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