I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
