I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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