I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
