Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
