Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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