i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize